Jun 10 2013
The narcissistic lover or partner with a narcissistic personality will create chaos and turmoil on a regular basis (and on purpose) to keep you in a heightened state of anxiety. He will do this even when things are good – and especially when things are good – so that you least expect the kick to the curb.
Everything that he does is done with the purpose of keeping you on your toes, afraid of his next move, wondering what he’s doing or not doing. You’re forever hoping he’s not doing what you’re thinking he’s doing (which, of course, he is!) and you may turn to super-sleuthing to prove yourself wrong or right. Again, this is all completely in line with the narcissist’s pathological relationship agenda.
Narcissistic chaos is passive-aggressive manipulative behavior and it is an everyday occurrence when you’re in a relationship with this type of creature. This is one of the many ways he trains you to behave according to his relationship agenda. Narcissistic chaos could include starting fights for no reason, leaving you for the day on a good note and then not calling for days, accusing you of something (that he’s doing – of that you can be sure). Creating chaos for no apparent reason….basically making you feel crazy (and chaos, believe me, can be created very passive-aggressively)…is a powerful and effective way for a narcissist or psychopath to manage down your expectations of the relationship until you will accept crumbs in exchange for all the love you give.
Victims of this type of emotional abuse always feel desperate and have trouble focusing on jobs, children, friends, etc. It’s a terrible way to feel and it’s all part of the narcissistic lover’s plan to control you.
The more you suffer, the more he knows you really care and the bigger rush he gets….Add to your list