Articles About Narcissism – Zari’s Blog

Plausible Deniability is the Narcissist’s Free Pass

When the narcissist is confronted with a lie, he will instantly create plausible deniability so that doubt is cast on the very facts/evidence laid out before him (or her!). Within seconds, a narcissist can spin a story to cover a story to cover a story, intentionally confusing the accusing partner who has typically taken great

Narcissist Abuse & the Torment of Cognitive Dissonance

By definition, cognitive dissonance is the psychological discomfort a person feels when he or she holds conflicting beliefs about something simultaneously. When we’re involved with a narcissist, cognitive dissonance is a psychological state that keeps us clinging to a narcissistic partner even when we know he/she is completely incapable of ever loving us.   In other

Reflections on 13 Months of No Contact (Re-post)

It’s been many, many months since the narcissist vanished into thin air, granting me the Grand Finale of Discards that I’d always known he’d give me on his way out some day. However, since I am always asked if it’s really possible to escape the madness, I thought I’d re-post the following article that gave

Narcissists, Holidays, & Dealing With the Christmas Grinch

The narcissist will always be the Grinch that steals our Christmas. With that said, I bet I could leave the rest of the page blank, letting you fill in the blanks! Yes, it’s that time of year again, friends! Readers who suffer the Holiday Discard will always understand what I’m talking about because narcissists and

Narcissists, Holidays, & the Seasonal Discard

With the holiday season upon us, those in relationships with narcissistic partners will be doing some extra special suffering. Narcissists are legendary holiday buzz killers and, if the narcissist is your partner, you could end up in any one of a number of situations depending upon your place in the narcissistic queue. Yes, as the

Narcissism In a Nutshell – Connecting the Dots! (Book Excerpt)

Although I’ve written several detailed books about narcissism in relationships, I’ve come to realize that there are those who want nothing more than a quick answer to that one nagging question: is he or isn’t he? Based on my correspondence and conversations with narcissist abuse victims worldwide, this is, indeed, the question of the hour

Why a Narcissist’s “Break-up” Never Seems Real

Narcissistic partners may discard us but that doesn’t necessarily mean that we will feel broken-up. Narcissists may give us the never-ending silent treatment but that doesn’t mean we feel any more disconnected. In fact, it’s quite the contrary. The more a narcissist “breaks-up” with us, the more irrationally connected we feel to this person…sometimes to

Co-Parenting With a Narcissist 101, Part 2

In Part I of this series about co-parenting with a narcissist, I discussed the simple facts of sharing children with someone who has a narcissistic personality. I explained that, no matter what, the situation is never going to be, for the narcissist, about the well-being of the children. It’s always going to be about you.

Narcissists Manage Down Our Relationship Expectations

The narcissist will, over time, manage down our expectations of the relationship so that we expect less and less and he gets away with more and more. This is one of the most powerful weapons in the narcissistic arsenal and it provides the narcissist (male or female) the most rewards. In fact, the narcissist personality

Narcissist Abuse & The Truth About Forgiveness

Once again, I’m compelled to present a slightly offbeat perspective to an aspect of the narcissist abuse recovery process – and this time it’s about forgiveness. Like many of my perspectives, this one differs greatly from the norm in that it doesn’t subscribe to any part of a “victim blame” philosophy. To the contrary, it