Comments on: Narcissists, Lies & the Great Relationship Reset

By: Zari Ballard

Zari Ballard — Wed, 18 Aug 2021 19:47:11 +0000

My goodness! What a miserable life she has provided but I am not understanding why you didn’t leave and why you don’t leave NOW. Long ago, it became less about her and more about you staying for…..? Why? Please…we only have one life and honestly, a life alone with freedom to NOT BE ABUSED would be better, in my opinion, than a life with this woman FOR ONE MORE DAY! Why are you even CONSIDERING spending ten more years in this awful situation? There is nothing lovable or even likable about her. Please reconsider your options. Things WILL look better once you are away from her.

Regards,

Zari

By: John Verleun

John Verleun — Fri, 06 Aug 2021 19:53:06 +0000

Married for 45 years 43 yrs no sex two grown sons. First 25 Yrs just resent sex 5 times per year 2002 25th anniversary stopped asking. No complaints from her. Just nothing. I was a catholic seminarian looking at my options, thinking of leaving, she was living in a polyamory community early 70s. She invited me to be engaged to her for 6 months agreeing to be exclusive and monogamous. I go to Chicago to teach as part of my obligation to the order I’m studying for. Late July a letter shows up. Hi. I’m at my bosses’ boat, it’s really tight up here, I’m having trouble getting my pants off so we can have sex. OBTW he’s a married man with two sons. No problem for her he says we’re divorced so just let me in there it’s fine. Fast forward I stupidly believed her assertion that monogamy didn’t start until our vows, really WTF. Beginning of our third year, with a one year old son in our family I ask for sex, she flips out screaming at me, why do you ask for something I never want to give you. If you need sex just fuck other women. Year 7 with now 2 sons she tell me the same thing. Year 9 the same thing, I don’t do it because I love my sons, having other relationships means not enough time at home. Year 10 1987asking for sex, with a snide comment on whether it would happen in this century or the next. She flips out and starts jumping up and down foaming at the mouth shouting you bastard bleeper and pounding my chest with both fists. I was bilaterally bruised on my chest. She finally fell on the floor exhausted. In the first ten years of our marriage she pimps me off to other women for sex and physicallly assaults me foe asking for sex. In 2016 she tells me she told her sister the day we were married we had an open marriage. Spoiler alert, only my husband doesn’t know this. On 2018 she tells me whether I like it or not we have an open marriage. On March22, 4:37pm, out of the middle of nowhere, she tells me that she’s addicted to stranger/just dog in heat sex. And that sex with me made her wish she was dead, being gang raped would be better sex, than sex with man who has supported anything she wanted to do professionally. Over the 45 years of our life , spending 30k a year on clothing, jewelry, and shoes which equals 4.5 million dollars. She denies saying or doing anything like that, but 43 years of no sex tells a different story, no she’s not classically hot, younger days nice looking, somewhat overweight, no visual sex prize, but I certainly wasn’t looking at her like that. Now by her own words, I’m old, bald, tired and fat 5:3. 190 lbs, all of which is still ok. How to survive 10 more years in this ocean of BS. OBTW she’s extraordinarily vicious and angry and I’m not sure she’s confrontable on anything, largely because she’s a woman, she could murder me in my sleep and turn me into an abusive monster and have the women cheer at the death of another abuser
Nothing looks good from here.

By: Daisy

Daisy — Fri, 30 Apr 2021 08:50:41 +0000

It was a lot easier when he didn’t have any phone access to me. Now I feel like I’m back to square one with this extremely self-centred, selfish man. All he does is go on about his children who he’s lost custody of for almost a year and a half and how much money he spent on them for their birthday etc. He did nothing on my birthday and seems really stingy towards me in that way but brags about how much money he earns. So sick of the bullshit. Still don’t know why I let him back into my home when I did. I have also told him about a health concern I had of my own and he was a real dick about it and made me feel bad and yeah just wondering why I did this to myself again..?

By: Daisy

Daisy — Sat, 24 Apr 2021 21:58:31 +0000

He came back after 5 months of no contact out of the blue. Made plans with me for the weekend, which were all bs heard nothing further. 11 days later I decide to change my phone number. 6 weeks of peace followed. About a week ago, happen to see him in my rear view mirror when driving along. Don’t know if this was a coincidence or not he followed me down a long stretch of road and I abruptly turned off and didn’t acknowledge him. Then the following night, he knocks on the door unexpectedly about 10pm, didn’t know who it was. Saw his car. Asked who it was. Then said what does he want. Ended up opening the door he got angry and pretended to leave when I wouldn’t let him in at first. Allthough I think this was just more manipulation, he didn’t intend to leave at that point. He had never just turned up like that before and he never mentioned not being able to get hold me on the phone. But looked a bit worried when he left and asked me for my new phone number, that I might not give it to him, after making more fake plans for the weekend. I’m sorry to say I have texted him my new phone number the next night to which there was no reply. I felt really anxious and rang him and he actually answered and said he he was too tired and stressed to talk but he’ll text me, call or something. So far nothing, so I stuffed it up for myself again and I’d even changed my number. So frustrating!