Comments on: “Narcspeak” IS Neural Linguistic Programing (NLP)

By: Zari Ballard

Zari Ballard — Sun, 08 May 2022 09:12:24 +0000

In reply to Rob.

Hi Rob,

NLP is used to MANIPULATE people or why else would ANYONE use it? “Engineering” a conversation to get the “result” you want? Nah…that USUALLY involves a lie of some sort or else you wouldn’t have to “engineer” anything. And a lie is a lie whether or not the person saying it chooses to BELIEVE it in that moment. How about PERSUADING someone to see it your way by making a good case…by speaking truth? Sure, you can think you’re “right” about something and proceed to badger someone and bug someone and keep twisting the listener’s words and responses until they finally say “Okay, fine, you win!” to shut you up…is that the “result” you want? Why would you do that unless you are a manipulator looking for a result that would only benefit you? I’ll stick to my opinion and you to yours and we’ll have to agree to disagree:) Thank you for writing, though, I do appreciate it!

By: Rob

Rob — Wed, 12 Jan 2022 14:39:33 +0000

Pretty damaging way to look at it (in my view). Psychology can be misused, just as much as NLP can, with checklists for psychopathy, and about 800+ ‘disorders’ much of which describe general human behaviour, etc. Psychology itself is not a problem, but trigger happy people are, same goes with NLP. Of COURSE NLP could be misused, but why blame NLP? If a practitioner misuses it, they’re at fault, not the system. The difference between NLP and narcissism, is that you can try and engineer a conversation to get the result you want, and whilst you could state that is maniuplation, ask yourself – 1, what is your intent? Is it, in your eyes, a good one – and, even if it is to serve yourself in some way, is it also to serve others? Can you see the benefits of what you’ll do for that person (and are these benefits they’ll likely be conscious of, or would they be harder to see) and 2, are you doing what you’re doing from a CENTRED place, and not a place of anger? Those are the big differences between ‘NLP’ ‘manipulation’ and narcissism… narcissism will not come from those places!! The intent will be ME, see ME, how I AM feeling, and they will certainly not come from a centered place when manipulating. And if you use NLP for selling stuff, yeah, naughty I guess.. But all it comes down to is understanding humans, how they tick – if you know saying thing A will make them more receptive than thing B, why say thing B? BUT – again, ask yourself, what is the intent. Am I doing a good thing. Tony Robbins did that to get someone on his course, argued for it in the way he knew that person would be more receptive. But the intent was – I think they would get a lot out of it. The place was centred, and self aware. That’s the difference and why it’s an unfair comparison. Narcissists are totally emotionally UN-self aware, sometimes they don’t even KNOW they’re manipulating, they just can’t help but defend their truth, their addiction to narcisstic supply outweighing any love for the other person. Not really comparable.. especially when you are comparing a human trait / set of actions… to a practice. Anyway.. just my view, felt I had to say it!

By: Annon

Annon — Sun, 23 May 2021 23:55:10 +0000

I had a narcissistic ex-boyfriend. After the relationship ended and I became aware of how badly I was manipulated and hurt, I went to see a psychiatrist. She turned out to be kind of hippy and naif, fond of conspiracy theories, and recommended me a Richard Bandler book. I was shocked by how narcissistic the man sounded, manipulating the things he promised he could do and what he delivered though his exercises. 80% of the book is criticism towards real psychology. There even is a part where he says his 2minute exercise can cure war and abuse victims from trauma.
I can’t believe how irresponsible it is that he has published books, and that my psychiatrist recommended it to me…

By: Zari Ballard

Zari Ballard — Tue, 18 Feb 2020 23:45:52 +0000

In reply to Dan. Hi Dan...I would have to agree 100%. Thanks for writing!

By: Dan

Dan — Mon, 25 Nov 2019 07:16:12 +0000

This is a really interesting take on word salad and I’d bet you’re right on with your theory connecting NLP to a narcissist.
I don’t think this kind of manipulation is exactly innate to a narcissist, though. It’s more like “best practices,” that all narcissists through a lifetime of trial and error eventually arrive at and some are better at it than others. Some are more sophisticated than others in their approach and stealth.

By: Sick of BS

Sick of BS — Sat, 02 Nov 2019 06:24:18 +0000

Actually…I’m back to correct myself…coz, apparently HITLER DID have blue eyes…stated here..According to Murray’s report, Hitler received frequent compliments on his grayish-blue eyes, even though they were described as “dead, impersonal, and unseeing.” He was slightly below average in height and had a receding hairline, thin lips, and well-shaped hands.

By: Sick of BS

Sick of BS — Thu, 17 Oct 2019 08:39:14 +0000

Sorry. I’m making comment AGAIN…but I HOPE to make women AWARE as it’s hurtful & devastating to know you were DUPED…I was HIT by 2…one after the other….& DAMN were they SIMILAR…even in comment…except NEITHER could have known each other. It’s the similarities that STILL astound me…nearly word for word…yet the lil extras I hope women wake up to.
It’s POINTING out LACK of emotion & WHEN they PRETEND they have some…the CROCODILE TEARS (is the ONLY way I can describe it)…where U SEE them sorta cry BUT it just doesn’t fit the story & the way the tears come seems WEIRD. The first weirdness was how I awoke to find them just STARING at me before their supposed sad story broke (both blue eyes I might add – where I know there is a strong relationship to deafness in blue eye white cats which proves some poss brain issues assoc with eye colour – not ALL but a possibilty & Hitler was completely into making a Nation of blonde hair & blue eyes…even tho himself was not…yet brown eyes ALWAYS dominates blue on a mating so they can carry the recessive gene & what it MAY carry with it).
And it WAS the full-on water works that just DRIPPED from their eyes (not real)…yet the reason for it – never made ANY sense. The stories had already been mentioned outside the bedroom – yet never made a flinching emotion then. Of course I was caring…yet it seemed weird…& of course it was ALL happening TOO FAST.
They play on women’s oxytocin…even one had the audacity to tell me he had been recently studying women psychology…altho he was NO doctor (so U wondered WHY)…yet told me his defacto falsely claimed he raped her (wh I believe he did) & his 2 Uni educated daughters had not spoken to him in 3yrs. Of course the relationship didn’t last long – I worked out he had a heap of women lined up…& even tried to triangulate me about it…thinking he could stir jealousy….it didn’t work.
BUT that is the SAD SICK person…U could be with….& all I can say for SANITY…is get AWAY from them.

By: Sick of BS

Sick of BS — Mon, 14 Oct 2019 06:25:05 +0000

It comes down to TRUST with ANY relationship…whether it’s allowing a workman into your home…if TRUST has been breached in ANY relationship WITHOUT the other party opting to find out WHY (or worse…just labelling U ‘CRAZY’ & couldn’t care less)….then there is your answer!

By: Sick of BS

Sick of BS — Mon, 14 Oct 2019 06:09:54 +0000

I’d also like to ADD…I don’t believe ALL sociopaths ACT OUT as some DO…some fight against the silly impulses (they ALL have – esp with the perpetual boredom they ALL sense with no emotional capability – of feeling happy or sad) & rationalise NOT to…but without being able to feel genuine emotion – it can be quite hard to see others enjoying life.
Which brings the challenge of HOW can U befriend someone of such affliction without having them sense being judged, alienated or labelled? They may NOT feel…but they can soon work out being rejected (or held at arms length) as anyone else can.
I’m CERTAIN U can NOT have a sociopath change direction who has taken on a predatory path (for stimulus) over many years…but hopefully, I’m WRONG there…yet I doubt it.
So… for those that DO chose the predatory path & couldn’t care less for anyone…the ONLY answer for those with feeling that happen to cross their unfortunate pathway (for your OWN sanity as a person with feelings & care) is get away…& NO CONTACT…leave them to their emptiness.

By: Sick of BS

Sick of BS — Mon, 14 Oct 2019 05:08:52 +0000

Thanks for this POST as it’s a clear REMINDER where we ALL got SUCKED IN by the charming misogynistic Narc CONMAN in the first place. Interestingly enough…I was watching 60 Mins & another Current Affair program in Australia called Sunday Night just last night…& BOTH PROGRAMS on dif channels were doing stories – pointing out the extreme DANGER of uncaring, unfeeling misogynistic conmen romance scammers (very charming & MANY good-looking)….yet frequent rapists behind closed doors (where U wouldn’t think they’d have to be) & others quite violent if exposed.
I believe these conmen ARE ALL SOCIOPATHS (4% population – ¾ men) which I consider is MORE than just the weak label of having a “personality disorder” (which sounds rather harmless) but rather can be PROVEN thru MRI they have LACK of certain brain function regarding emotion & as a result can be EXTREMELY dangerous & ruthless toward the most vunerable people in society – esp with their CRAZY love for PREDATION which is the ONLY thing that gives them stimulus as they CAN’T FEEL much else: good or bad (mentally on the same scale of serial killing psychopaths just as there is scale of severity with autism yet autism does NOT lack care – & certainly are NOT predators).
There is such a RISE in the reports now…authorities are seriously considering ways to HOLD these NUT-JOBS accountable as they ARE fully aware WHAT they are doing & KNOW RIGHT from WRONG vs someone with acquired frontal-lobe brain damage…but we ALL know they covertly work around having you TRY to PROVE their offence….as life is a GAME to them.
Don’t forget intellectual IQ is NOT emotional IQ & BOTH IQs are necessary for a balanced INTELLIGENT person….these people have NO emotional IQ but have learnt to PRETEND it & many have extremely high intellectual IQs to make up for it. BUT that DOESN’T make them intelligent & SOCIETY needs to realise that.